an extremely superficial reading of the figure skating fashion influences evident in what my boyfriend adrien brody wore to the met ball

i’m sorry, i’ve been horribly remiss in celebrating my boyfriend adrien brody’s sartorial choices for this year’s met ball. all apologies. voila! WHAT IZ UP?! departs The Mark Hotel for the Met Gala at the Metropolitan Museum of Art on May 4, 2015 in New York City.

now, surely you know i love this. and surely you see why.

HAS HE EVER LOOKED MORE MALE RUSSIAN FIGURE SKATER?!?!?! um… no.

because OBVIOUSLY this ensemble is a distant cousin of viktor petrenko’s 1988 winter olympic games men’s figure skating long program costume. (OF WHICH THERE ARE FAR TOO FEW PHOTOGRAPHS ON THE INTERNET.)

viktor 88

would that everything men wore were a distant cousin of viktor petrenko’s 1988 winter olympic games men’s figure skating long program costume… i’m pretty sure the world would be a better place.

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but its influences are myriad, let’s be real. and this…

departs The Mark Hotel for the Met Gala at the Metropolitan Museum of Art on May 4, 2015 in New York City.

is also shades of evgeni plushenko in 2010.

2010vancouver

(geez. 2010 doesn’t seem that long ago and yet how dated lysacek’s vera wang with swarovski crystal snake looks now… [to say nothing of the scott disick slick-back])

it is also, of course, a very subtle homage to dmitri dmitrenko’s less subtle homage to cardinal richelieu via a studded brocade cosby sweater.

Dmitri Dmitrenko

which, in turn, feels like an homage to the brocade love seat my parents bought when i was a teenager as a crucial move in the pivot of our living room into the decor of the 1990s.

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there is also, as is usually the case of things fashionably hardcore, more than a little bit of tonya harding to be found here. in the wine tone and the beaded flowers and the pathos of its gems.

th

though the deepness of her V would make anyone unfamiliar with the audacity of figure skating necklines blush and, simultaneously, lends my boyfriend’s rather more chaste arrangement- the satin! the velvet! the shirt! the bowtie!- the tyrannical repressedness of a character in a wharton novel.

all of which to say, well played, my boyfriend adrien brody. you have pulled off a veritable matryoshka doll of homages with this blazer.

britney claps

you have successfully, in this one ensemble, combined all of the most essential elements for costuming on ice.

a minor point, maybe, but a worthy one nonetheless.

and my career advice still stands… FOR THE LOVE OF GALA, PLEASE DO A BIOPIC OF DALI.

midnight-in-paris-dali

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